To do list

I have been inspired to write down everything I want to accomplish this year. Some are small and some are big. So here goes.

1. Make a baby- This is my biggest goal this year, and it's proving to be alot harder then I thought it would be. It only took us 2 months to fall pregnant with Madeline. So far we have been trying for 6 months and still no baby:( One thing I must do is to stop stressing about it, maybe that's my problem. By the end of this year would love to have a little brother or sister for Madeline:)

2. Get my licence- First I have to stop procrastinating and just go do it. It's so hard, I'm freaking scared of driving. I really need to do this for madeline's sake, I want to be able to take her places. So my goal is to get my licence by March/April.

3. Play with Madeline more- I play with her just not as much as I should, I want to spend more time outside with her and taking her to parks and play dates, she deserves to have a fun life and I'm determined to give it to her:)

4. Go on dates with my husband- Melissa and I have organised once a month to take each other's children so we can have some time alone with our husbands, I'm really looking forward to this one;)

5. Spend more time with family- I really want Madeline to get to know her cousins better so I can't wait to see her playing and going crazy with them.

That's all I have and now that I have posted them I'm going to have to stick with them,Crap! :)

I'm back

Ok I know it's been along time since my last blog but I just felt like doing up another one and sharing some photos of my beautiful baby girl. She is 14 months today, she is no longer a baby:(. She now says a few words Ta, Mama, Dadda,tickle, bath(ba) and a few more( having a mental blank) she says about 8 words all up which I think is pretty good for her age. She is becoming a quite the little dancer( she does a little belerina move from the wiggles:). Madeline is also developing quite an attitude and points her finger at me and tells me off( I find it so hard not to laugh). She has such a funny personality, takes after her daddy, I'm so relieved she's not like me.

We went to the wiggles concert yesterday and had a great time, Madeline was fairly difficult but we are planning to do it again next time they come to Brisbane.

We are planning to take a trip to Bundaberg next year, with my brother and SIL and nephews. Ever since Madeline was born I've had this desire to go back so I'm really looking forward to it. Well i am very tired and in abit of pain so I'm off to bed .

Finally got Madeline to sleep, she slept for a half hour this morning so I'm hoping this will be for at least an hour. Gives me a little time to blog. Been having alot of problems with Madeline lately, she has been screaming alot, the other day on our way to northlakes she screamed most of the way like she's been tortured but anyway she fell asleep which was great. The last 2 days have been good she has been a little whingy but nothing too bad, so I'm hoping that her screaming has stopped, was about to have a nervous breakdown. We just bought Madeline a high chair, she looks so small and cute in it, and she seems to really like it so I'm happy about that.

We are going camping this weekend Yay! It will be our first holiday together as a family, so we are really looking forward to it, it's only for 2 days but it will be nice to have a break anyway. (Damn Madeline just woke up oh well she can stay in the cot for a little bit, 15 minutes is not enough.) I am a little worried about how Madeline will go with sleeping in a tent, she has a port a cot to sleep in so should be ok.

I am going for my first ever driving lesson next week and I am freaking out about it, I don't know what the hell I'm doing I just hope the instructor is very very patient. I really need to do this for Madeline otherwise I probably would'nt do it at all. Anyway I better go check on Madeline.

Ok thought it was time for another post and maybe some photos. Have been having a hard time with Madeline over the last few days think she miight be having another growth spurt or shes teething again. It is taking alot longer to get her to sleep and shes been waking up crying more than normal. Last night she woke up at 3 am and wanted to play, what's with that? She's just getting harder to handle, I'm coping ok though just a little more stressed.

Just got over a stomache bug was feeling awful on tuesday thought I was going to die,( ok a little dramatic) Was vomiting a fair bit. I have to say the hardest thing about being a mother is when you get sick no matter how awful you feel you still have a job to do, and that is to look after your child and that they come first no matter what. I was always worried how I would go when I got sick but I think I managed ok. I got josh to come home early so he could help me out, needed his help.

Josh has the next 2 days off we are looking forward to it, sunday is now our relaxing day and monday we get our bills paid and get shopping done. It's so great now that josh has 2 days off in a row, we feel so much more relaxed and alot happier too. OK well I'm off now will leave you with some photos of my gorgeous girl.

.

Maddy has been so well behaved today, well better than she was yesterday. She's been such a whinger lately, yesterday was the worse day in the history of worse days.

I wish josh was home miss him lots just need one of his beautiful hugs, he gave me a really nice massage last night, I really needed it.

Can't wait to go have coffee with my sisters tomorrow, it will be nice to catch up with them as I don't get to see them as often as I like.

Sometimes I wonder how can I feel so alone, I have my husband and my baby girl and plenty of friends I just don't get it. But It probably has alot to do with my husband working 9 and a half hrs a day and most times my friends are busy with their own lives so im left with my baby girl.

I's so hard too that i don't have my licence, I feel so mad at myself for not getting it before madeline was born, I wanted to but just kept procrastinating. It upsets me ,not just that I can't go and meet friends for coffee but I also can't take my little girl to the park or the beach or just to spend time with other babies it makes me feel so bad, sometimes I feel like i'm a really bad mother. I do make up for it though well I try, I spend time playing with her and reading to her which she loves.

I am now determined to go get my licence I really need to do this for madeline, and so that I don't feel so alone.

josh and madeline